torsdag, november 23, 2006

Ten Ways to Avoid Lending Your Wheelbarrow to Anybody

1 PATRIOTIC

May I borrow your wheelbarrow?
I didn't lay down my life in World War II
so that you could borrow my wheelbarrow.

2 SNOBBISH

May I borrow your wheelbarrow?
Unfortunately Lord Goodman is using it.

3 OVERWEENING

May I borrow your wheelbarrow?
It is too mighty a conveyance to be wielded
by any mortal save myself.

4 PIOUS

May I borrow your wheelbarrow?
My wheelbarrow is reserved for religious ceremonies.

5 MELODRAMATIC

May I borrow your wheelbarrow?
I would sooner be broken on its wheel
and buried in its barrow.

6 PATHETIC

May I borrow your wheelbarrow?
I am dying of schizophrenia
and all you can talk about is wheelbarrows.

7 DEFENSIVE

May I borrow your wheelbarrow?
Do you think I'm made of wheelbarrows?

8 SINISTER

May I borrow your wheelbarrow?
It is full of blood.

9 LECHEROUS

May I borrow your wheelbarrow?
Only if I can fuck your wife in it.

10 PHILOSOPHICAL

May I borrow your wheelbarrow?
What is a wheelbarrow?

-- Adrian Mitchell

Photo:Paul of Vermont

lørdag, november 18, 2006

Today, around quarter past three

Unusually warm today, around 10 C. We drove down to the fjord, a place five minutes away from us where it's very popular to go swimming in the summer. But not in November.

I must remember to always bring my proper camera. These photos are taken with my crappy mobile phone camera. Still, you get the idea. It was lovely - beautiful colours, and almost no people.











And the water was VERY cold. I tried to keep my hands in it long enough for my girlfriend to take the picture. Didn't succeed.

torsdag, november 16, 2006

Mark Morford: Gay Marriage Is Still Evil?

Because the funny thing is, despite all the frantic state bans, no one can really say why

Which reminds me, I still have yet to hear it.

Despite all the right-wing puling, all the Bible-humping and the anti-gay marriage campaigning in all those states that just banned it and how everyone in the nation has apparently been deeply contemplating what hot gay sex must really be like because, oh my God, it sure has been in the news a lot lately (thanks, Pastor Ted!), I still, as of this writing, to this very day, I still have yet to hear a single coherent and comprehensive explanation from the nation's homophobes as to what, exactly, is so wrong about gay love.

Oh, make no mistake, I've heard the theories. I have plenty of hissing, puerile, "fag"-laden hate mail. I've heard the half-baked notions regarding "debauched" morality, the necessity of procreation, the pseudoscientific studies claiming kids are in danger of being "recruited," the quivery references to bitterly homophobic interpretations of biblical passages that somehow "prove" that gay love is immoral, unethical, dangerous. It's all just a bit cute, in a grossly ignorant sort of way.

And yet, one by one, each and every one of these silly ideas has been rather effortlessly disproved, blown to spiritual or intellectual smithereens, discredited to death and/or laughed into oblivion much the way a true scientist shoots wine through his nose at the mention of creationism.

And so still I wait for a real answer.

Read the rest HERE. Great stuff!

torsdag, november 09, 2006

Celia Celia

When I am sad and weary
When I feel all hope has gone
When I walk along High Holborn
I think of you with nothing on

Adrian Mitchell

onsdag, november 01, 2006

Whisky

Reflections on Ice-Breaking

Candy
Is Dandy
But liquor
Is quicker.

-- Ogden Nash

Both girlfriend and I didn't start liking whisky until a couple of years ago. It happened in Amsterdam, our friends dragged us along to a whisky bar, where they had an amazing amount of different brands. I asked the bartender if he could recommend something for someone who don't really like whisky. He suggested something Irish, and we tried it. We tried two or three brands, but my girlfriend fell in love with something called Green Spot. We've tried to find it again ever since, but no luck. And that's not strange, because the distillery only make like 3000 bottles each year.

When we were leaving London, we found a shop at Stanstead airport called "World of Whisky" or something like that. Now, bear this in mind, before walking into this shop around 11 am this had happened earlier in the day:

- we had to get up really early
- the hotel breakfast was crap
- to get to the train station during London rush hour is NO FUN
- because of all the security stuff the queue was very long and slow
- then there was another queue to get some proper food
- at this point my girlfriend was close to exploding, because hungry girlfriend = very angry girlfriend = nervous and annoyed HB

We finally got some food, and ate in a silence that got less and less icy, fortunately. Then we walked into "World of Whisky". I asked the man standing behind the counter:

HB: Do you have Green Spot? It's an Irish whisky.

And while I asked I immediately noticed that the guy started smiling, as if remembering something pleasant. Then he said:

I have it at home (*pleased grin*), but unfortunately I don't have it in the shop. Because as you might know, they only make...

HB: ...3000 bottles each year, yes. (*Sigh*)

Girlfriend: Do you have something else you would recommend?

He suggested Redbreast, and explained that it was made in the same way as Green Spot, and had a lot of the same qualities. He gave us a little taste, and we immediately decided to buy it - because it was delicious.

And then comes the bit that made my day. After we had bought it he showed us a magazine where Redbreast had won first prize in an Irish whisky competition of some sort. It had won over whisky brands that were a lot more expensive. It put both me and my girlfriend in a really good mood, because it was so obvious that he wasn't pushing us into buying. He was just genuinely interested in whisky, and wanted to share his enthusiasm with us. It was brilliant! And so was the whisky. Unfortunately it's gone now, but Redbreast is a bit easier to get hold of than Green Spot.

Syd, regarding Macallan: it's a great whisky. I remember it as cleaner and purer than Balvenie Doublewood, which is more like an explosion of taste. So I guess it depends on what you prefer:-) I'm definately checking out Dalmore. You're the second or third person to recommend it, actually. We ought to have a whisky tasting party again. A whisky tasting party in November, with temperatures below zero and lots of snow is probably even better than a whisky tasting party in July. Whisky is so good when you're feeling cold!